Host of the WEEKLY GRINGO (Podcast)
Back in his prime, Griff swears he could “touch-rim” on the basketball court. While this is a dubious claim at best, when he says it… you want it to be true. Griff might also tell you something like “Sin on Saturday, Pray on Sunday” while he’s drunk as hell, on a Wednesday. Last time I saw Griff, he told me that he ate 4 bologna sandwiches that day (2 slices of bread + 2 slices of bologna per sandwich = A whopping total of 8 pieces of bread and 8 slices of bologna). When I questioned as to why he would do that, he simply answered “I was hungry”. Griff enjoys watching online pornography, but it seems he enjoys it strictly for the entertainment value of it. That’s both confusing and a little endearing, in some strange way. Griff once called Crazy Tea while he was working at a bank and said “Yo Tea I broke my car cause I drove it too fast, you think you can hook me up with a loan?”. Tea absolutely did not have the ability to do that, and even more puzzling was the fact that Griff called the bank’s customer service number to reach Tea vs. calling Tea’s personal cell number. Another time, Griff said that he couldn’t meet us out at the bar because he went to Bass Pro Shops to get a new hat and spent all his money. None of us even knew he fished, let alone liked buying hats at Bass Pro Shops, but we weren’t surprised. Because you see, Griff is kind of a confusing character, a bit of an enigma. Why would anyone get so upset they had to leave the room just because someone said something negative about White Castle? Why would someone refer to a red-haired girl walking down the street that they fancied as “His Little Mermaid”? The answer is, because it’s Griff. That’s about as good of one as we got, at least.